Can Love Be Manipulated?

Love is a choice and a voluntary act – Susy Pujiro

After talking to my friend about relationship and love.  I cannot stop thinking about the conversation we had, how love can be manipulated.  We both agree that love and relationship go hand in hand.  We also agree the ingredients to have a healthy relationship are love, trust, respect, communication and of course, chemistry or some say “sparks” 🙂  Love can bring us happiness and also heartache.  Love is the foundation  and glue to the relationship.  Without love, you have nothing to work on a relationship. Same with chemistry or sparks, without them, nothing lits up 🙂

Love has many facets.  There are lover’s love, family love, brotherly love and friendship love. All relationship has love as its foundation.  That is why you fall in love first, then you want to be with the person because you can’t imagine living without them.  Because of your love to the person, you want to build a relationship which you hope will turn into a marriage and make a family.

Can love be forced? No.  Even if you succeed in forcing love, that love can turn into hatred.  You cannot force someone to love you if they don’t have it in their heart.  They can fake on loving you, but it’s only temporary.  Because that forced love will turn into resentment, bitterness and rejection.  Instead of happiness, forced love makes life miserable for both parties.

Can love be manipulated? Yes, you can manipulate love for personal gain or for whatever reason you have.  In this case, you will make the person, whose love you manipulate , a prisoner of love.  The question is whether that love will last forever.  Just like the bird in the cage, waiting to be free.  It will always look for an opportunity for a little crack in the door, to push through and fly.  Once it flies, it will never come back or it will die. What you will have is love zombie 🙂

Love that is forced and manipulated will only last a while because it’s not truly love.  Because love is a voluntary act and a choice.  You can’t control when you fall in love, but you can choose to fall out of love.  I can choose who I love and I don’t love.  I can choose to love my dogs, my parents, my children, my home.  I can choose to love voluntarily.  I also can choose to fall out of love for some reasons, or I let love dies.

Love is also a matter of the heart.  The Bible says “out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks”.  Everything is conceived in the heart, then it goes to the mind and finally the mouth speaks.  So, when love dies, it first dies in the heart. When love dies in the heart, it can only be  revived if there is still a seed of love that with some TLC, that seed of love will grow again.  That’s when your relationship is restored and it has to be a 100% effort on both parties.  If there is no seed of love, no matter what you try to revive love, it will not come back to life. Just like the saying “home is where the heart is”.  When the heart is not in the home, love flies away.

In my personal experience with love, relationship and betrayal of love.  I learned without love, I have nothing to work on a relationship.   I can force and manipulate love and make the person to stay.  But it’s temporal, because soon or later, that person will leave because his heart and love have flown away.  I only hold the person as my prisoner of love without the heart, it’s an empty love.   I want a relationship with love and a heart that are given to me voluntarily 🙂

The Journey Continues…

Well… here I am today.  Finally I can take a deep breath and smile 🙂 I am done with the final editing of my book, just waiting for a few more endorsements and it’s ready to go to the publisher.   Life is truly full of surprises with its twists and turns, highs and lows, and mountains and valleys.  Sometimes, in the midst of an ordinary life, a curveball is thrown your way that takes your breath away and knocks you off your feet.  The outcome of your life will be determined by how you respond to that curveball.

I have learned that it’s possible to go through the mountains and valleys of life, and the curveballs can become blessings in disguise.  I look back at my life for the last few years and I could say that I have come a long way.  I am happier now and having the time of my life.  My first attorney asked me to write my life story for the deposition of my divorce, which became the outline for this book.  I had to go through some hurdles to finish the book.  .  It was hard to write when you have to relive the events in your life that you do not want to remember, but with God’s grace, I was able to finish it.

Here is the little taste of what the book is all about 🙂

“I found myself captivated by Susy’s true life, fairytale love story that began at such a young age.  Her unique style of writing will draw you into her story, as if you are reliving each moment with her.  Every girl dreams of finding the man who will sweep her off of her feet and marry her.  Then they are supposed to live happily ever after…but many times people change and divorce happens.  Since 2006, I have had the privilege of working with Susy professionally in real estate and as a volunteer in conference ministry.  I have witnessed firsthand many of the ups and downs as they happened in Susy’s life.  Her journey through divorce has changed her in many ways…for the better.  She is a happier, stronger, and more self-confident woman and I am so proud of her accomplishments.  There is nothing fake about Susy; she is very real and truly loves the Lord with all of her heart.  Her life story gives hope and inspiration to anyone going through a life-changing event.  I have never met anyone like Susy and I am so thankful to be able to call her my close friend”. – Rhonda Anderson.

So 🙂  stay tuned and I will let you know when the book is available 🙂

Who Is God?

God is a touchy subject to discuss as there are a lot of opinions about him.  Some people don’t believe God, some people do.  Some people say He does not exist because we can not see Him, some people believe He exists.

 So, who is God?

 For me personally, God is the creator of heaven and earth.  When I look around me, I am in awe with His creation.  The fish in the sea, the stars in the sky, the moon and the sun, the planets and animals,  the trees and flowers, and not to mention us who is created in His own image.  He created all of these beautiful things for us to enjoy because He loves us.  He is Trinity : The Father, The Son and The Holy Spirit.  He is lover of my soul, he loves me unconditionally.  He always has His eyes on me all the time, He treasures me and put me in the cup of His hands.  When I think of Him, He makes me smile and my heart swells.  He is the strong tower who gives me shelter when the storm is raging in.  He is the wind beneath my wings so I can fly above the storm of life.  He is the light house that will guide me to safety.  He hides me under His wings to protect me.  He is the alpha and omega, the beginning and the end.  He is a gentleman, He keeps His promises to me.  He is my daddy who loves to bless His little girl with every good gift.  He showers me with His mercy and goodness all the days of my life.

 But you say, how can you say that..? it’s easy..  think of it as dating and falling in love with your girlfriend or boyfriend.  You can not wait to see them, you think of them throughout the day.  You smile when you get the text message.  Your mind is consumed with your lover.  It will be the same way with God 🙂

 God is love.  You can not see what love looks like but you can feel love and you know what love is. You can not see Him with your bare eyes but you can see Him with the eyes of your heart.  You will know Him because you know Him first in your heart 🙂

 Take a moment, close your eyes and think of love.  If you dare, 🙂 take the step to get to know Him and you will be amazed at what Love can do for you 🙂

 

Love …..

“Love is like playing piano, first you must learn to play by the rules, then you must forget the rules and play from the heart” – Anonymous

That is right 🙂 … anything plays from the heart is always beautiful that’s what I have experienced.  There are so many rules and regulations and the do’s and the dont’s and the ifs and what not… but when it comes to the most important thing or person in our life, we have to make the decision from the heart because  the heart sees from deep within your soul. In the heart lies the seeds of love ready to be sown and I hope you sow it generously as you will reap lots and lots of love back at ya J

Just remember,  out of the abundance of the heart, the seeds of love will be sown and the words will be spoken kindly 🙂 so follow your heart 🙂